BROOKE
MILLER
"Okay, it is time to wake up for Sunday school and church," said my parents every Sunday morning. And I would always get up and go, without asking any questions as to why we were going. This is how our Sunday morning went, breakfast, Sunday school, church, lunch, and then chill the rest of the day, every single Sunday. And that sequence of events turned into my "routine," the just go with the flow mentality. In my opinion, routines can both be good and bad, but in this case, I feel like it was fairly bad. Now, do not get me wrong I have been extremely blessed to be able to grow up in a Christian home with God-loving parents. But, as a youngster, I had to get out of that trap or routine because I knew I was not going to be able to grow in my relationship with God, by living that way. Between the ages of 3 and 8, I thought that God was just some guy that we talked about in Sunday school or during children's church. And that he had a bunch of friends that we should be just like. But, obviously my perspective has shifted since then. I did accept Christ into my heart when I was 5, but you ladies know that a five-year old probably does not fully grasp the concept of god. From ages 8 to 11, my pastor really dove into His Word, that I came to a sense that God was and is my ultimate Savior. I got baptized at the age of 11, with my cousin. And that moment was so life changing, being able to proclaim my love for God in front of all my family and friends.
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This was a stage in my life that I felt like HAD to happen in order to go to heaven one day. So, for a while I lived the way that God would want me to live, but keep in mind I was only 11. And also, keep in mind that everyone sins, definitely me included. All you ladies know that middle school and high school can be some of the most challenging years. So, as I transitioned to middle school, I continued to keep in mind to shine my light bright for God, which seemed hard to do at a public school. Muddle school did come with many challenges, but through the support of my family, I got through it.
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Then, freshman year came and you all know that with high school comes drama, but only when you let that drama consume you is when it starts to get nasty. And, unfortunately I let that happen to me, I fell into the trap of gossiping and even getting my feelings hurt at times. At this point, I only had a couple of "true" friends. Sophomore and Junior year were probably the hardest years of my adolescence. I fell into temptation, my heart got broken, I lost friends, I hurt other people's feelings, just to list a few. And, that was when I know I had to take a step back and evaluate my life. I did attend youth group almost every Wednesday throughout high school, except my junior year, I took a break from youth group for about three months. And at that time, I thought that was the best solution for when seemed like my never-ending problems. I had also attended some conferences with my youth group in the years past, and from that I would feel this fire in my soul, a longing to grow even closer to God, for about a month, if that, and then it would vanish. That happened way more times than it should have, and to be honest, that is still happening to this day.
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I moved past those hardships in my life because I realized that the whole time, through those obstacles, Christ our Savior was with me, along with my family. But God was the solid rock that I held onto when I felt like my world was crashing down. Yes, throughout this process, I did lose some relationships but I also gained some stronger relationships that were made available to me right when I needed them most. God knew. He knew that I needed a good support system to get me through those hardships. God is all-knowing, He knows when you are stressed, when you feel like you are alone, when you are frustrated, He knows. and HE is always going to be there alongside you, to comfort you ladies. :)
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So yes, my relationship with God has not always been 100% where I want it to be. But, that just makes me want to grow so much closer to Him. Take the time to read the Bible and dive into His Word, take the time to spread his immense love to everyone surrounding you. Take the time to worship our Heavenly Father. Because He is always going to be your sidekick, my dear friends.
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If you ladies ever need any help or encouragement, please feel free to text me at (330)600-0468. Or send me an email at balexismiller@gmail.com. I would love to talk to each and every one of you!
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Thank you so much for taking time to read a little piece of my heart, I hope you can share a piece of your heart with someone today too.